Dar!

Kwa wale wanaoifahamu Dar vizuri, hakika wanaitambua

sehemu hii. Unataka kupata jack pot? Jaribu kunena.

Yaliyojiri kwenye safari hii

Safari yangu ya Dar ilikuwa na matukio mengi ya kufurahisha.
Lakini penye mengi hapakosi na machache ya kuogofya.


Siku ya jumamosi nilikuwa nimetoka na familia kuelekea nje ya jiji kuona maendeleo ya hukoo kwa wananchi. Tukiwa kwenye high way ya kwenda Bagamoyo, kwa ghafla wife akashtukia jambo........, maana aliona mwenendo usio wa kawaida kwenye chini kidogo ya dashboard...

Alipo angalia kwa makini, hakukuwa na kosa, maana alimuona kiumbe wa malaika akitambaa taratibu kuelekea palipokuwa na gear ya gari, wakati huo mie nilikuwa nimekaza macho mbele maana mwendo kasi wa barabara hii, na uwingi wa magari, inabidi uende kwa uangalifu.

Kwa sauti ya staha na ukakamavu nikasikia mvumo wa sauti ukisema, Baba nanihii, nyoka huyo. Nilipiga jicho la haraka, na kweli alikuwa mwenyewe akielekea alikokaa waifu, ikabidi nitafute upenyo ili nisimame .. lakini nikaona anakuja kwangu hivyo nikamwambie amtwange, lakini... asilani akamkosa, na jamaa akabadili uelekeo wa kuja kwangu, na kugeuza uelekeo sijui alifikiri ndio salama huko.... Nilimtolea macho huku naelekea pembeni ya barabara, maana katikati ilikuwa ni hatari kwa magari mengine.
Niliposimama, nikaamuru watu wafungue milango waishie nje, lakini nyoka alikuwa mjanja sana, maana alishakimbilia sehemu ambayo waifu alikuwa ameweka miguu yake, na mlango ulipofunguliwa tu, yeye alikuwa wa kwanza kutoka na kutokomea porini!

Tulisimama hapo kwa dk 5 kupekua gari yote, maana watoto walikuwa usingizini kiti cha nyuma. Baadaye tuliondoka kuendelea na safari huku tukitweta.

Kwa sasa tunachukua tahadhari kupaki chini ya miti na kuacha madirisha wazi, maana hawa wageni nao jua likizidi, duh, lazima wajisalimishe.

I am Back

The journey from Dar es Salaam to Kigali was longer than we expected... It took us nearly seven hours from the time of departure from Dar es Salaam to the time of landing in Kigali.

By direct flight it is hardly 2 hours, but there is no direct route anyway.

We had to go through four countries

From Dar es Salaam (Tanzania) We went to Nairobi (Kenya) where where we had to connect to Kigali, but our flight was cancelled and we were connected to the flight going to Bujumbura (Burundi) and after more than one hour in Bujumbura, we flew to Kigali (Rwanda) arriving nearly at 4.00 am completely exhausted.

Make Life Easier for Yourself

First give yourself a rank. Call yourself something like ‘Reverend’

Then you start preaching that you can cure anything – AIDS, you can make cripples walk, you can bring the dead back to life. Tell whoever will listen to you that you can raise the dead. They wake up from their graves and start dancing the rhumba, samba, sindimba or something.

Just believe in your lies and they will believe in whatever song you sing.

Then after two months promote yourself to archbishop and say Haleluhya everytime.

Never forget that there is a sucker born every minute in this world. They will believe whatever you say. It is good business, i mean the religion business.

Call your business, the Full Nondo Gospel Church. No body will realise the fishy name. It pays. Just don’t forget to say Haleluhya a lot.

And when you get a crowd of worshippers, announce that you will run for parliament. By that time you will have all those titles. You could call yourself prophet. So your name will be Dr. Prophet Nicodemus (MP) of the Full Nondo Gospel Church!

Then you can make money from the church and from the politics.

Mjini hapo, maisha ni akili, na akili ni nywele.

Katizo la muda

Wapendwa wana blog

Leo nimekumbuka nyumbani.
Nimetoka ofisini moja kwa moja kuelekea airport. Natumaini usiku huu nitakuwa Dar es salaam.
Mkiona kimya basi mjue ndio nipo njiani.

Tukutane tena baadaye kwa habari motomoto za nyumbani

Honduras: This is a Joke now!

Honduras’s deposed President Manuel Zelaya on his efforts to regain office he manages to slip in into the Honduras and taking shelter in the Brazilian Embassy.

The interim government has asked Brazilian embassy to handle him to them so that he can be charged from frauds he made.

I think this is a drama show by which the current Honduran government is trying to. They are the one who deposed him to Costa Rica after forcefully remove him from the power, now they are coming with accusations that he has case to answer. My question is.... why did they deposed him in the first instance! And why did they denies him entry when he attempted to go back!!

Hayo ndio mambo ya Dunia.

Uganda: Nani wa kulaumiwa?

Hii sheria ya wapi! Nafikiri wale jamaa wawili wameshapata khabari kwenye makalio yao pia

Wiki iliyopita kulikuwa na vurugu Jijini Kampala ambazo zilijitokeza baada ya Kabaka Ronald Mutebi kupigwa kizuizi na Serikali ya Uganda cha kwenda kuzuru wilaya ya Kayunga kwenye sherehe ya vijana. Kwenye wilaya hii kuna mchanganyiko wa makabila mbalimbali ikiwa ni pamoja na kabila dogo la Banyala ambao hawataki kabisa uwepo wa Kabaka.

Serikali ilidai ni kwa sababu ya kiusalama, lakini kizuizi hiki kilisababisha vifo kadhaa vya wananchi waliopinga kizuizi hicho, machafuko hayo yalienda sambamba na uharibifu wa mali pamoja na wizi.

Mimi nafikiri kuna umuhimu wa kuweka ukomo wa kiongozi, nahisi Mchungaji Yoweri amekuwa anatoa maamuzi kama vile anaongoza familia yake na kusahau kuwa Uganda ni ya waganda wote. Ni wakati muafaka wa kustaafu ili abakize kasifa fulani ambako watu watakuwa wanamkumbuka.

Magic: Being able to make private part disappear

How can you make somebody's private parts disappears just before the act of sex!!!

Click the article to read.

Damn Computer!

You can invite heart diseases!



Your kitchen .... and laundry will move to your office!



This is terrible stage

And finally ....




Go and work!

Thanks Mdau for compiling!!

Semenya:Hermaphrodite???

Yule mkimbiaji wa Afrika kusini Semenya (Pichani juu)aliyeleta utata kuhusu jinsia yake kwenye mashindano ya riadha ya dunia yaliyofanyika Ujerumani, inasemekana amegundulika ya kuwa ana jinsia zote mbili, lakini ya kike haijakamilika, na ya kiume pia korodani zake hazikuwa zimeshuka toka tumboni.

Habari hii imewakasirisha sana watu wa Afrika kusini, akiwamo rais Jacob Zuma, kwa kuwashutumu waliotoa habari hizo wanaingilia undani wa maisha ya mtu kwa uhusiano wa mtu na daktari wake kwa kutoa habari zake nje bila idhini ya Semenya mwenyewe

For more inforead HERE here and HERE

Mexico: Another blow?

Another blow to Mexico tourism industry, Around 5 people belived to Bolivian in origin, yesterday (Loonie day) attempted to hijack Mexican liner from vacation town of Cancún to Mexico city, but they end up in Police custody. All passengers and crews were reported to be safe.

This follows hit of swine flu this year and war against drug traffickers which all hampered tourism sector.

Uchumi wa Mexico unategemea kuporomoka zaidi hasa kwenye sekta ya utalii ukizingatia utekaji huu umetokea kwa watu waliokuwa wanatembelea mji maarufu wa utalii, ukichanganya na mafua ya nguruwe, na madawa ya kulevya, hali inaweza kuwa mbaya zaidi.

09.09.09 - Spannish lunatic day?

Alguien era diciéndome que muchos nines en el mundo de Spannish, significan día loco.

¿El hoy es 09.09.09 hace esto significa que mucha gente en el mundo de Spannish ella es enojada?

Soy apenas un mensajero.

No me sople para satisfacer

Ubebaji wa mizigo mipana! - Wide load

Huu ni ubunifu wa aina yake kwa kubeba mzigo mkubwa ukitumia mtaji wa masikini (nguvu zake)




Kuokoa muda na mafuta!!




Wide load

Sasa je!

Photo from Travellernews

Medical Advances

Dr Chung robot nicknamed as Chungbot has made wonders on medical treatment for people who suffered severe burns in the US military hospital in Iraq.

With his proxy’s cameras zooming and wireless antennas beaming, Chung stood in a kitchen in Virginia and examined his patients from 1,500 miles away, providing a connection between doctor and patient even as Chung was on vacation.

Use of the robot began as an Army telemedicine pilot project several years ago. But its success in allowing Chung to check on patients while deployed and in training nurses far away means the Chungbot.
Using the robot allows Chung to examine wounds and interact with the patient, though someone else at the bedside takes vital signs and provides hands-on care at the doctor’s instruction.

One badly wounded soldier was brought here after Chung and others treated him in Iraq, and the staff in Baghdad wondered how he was doing. Instead of calling for an update from a doctor here, Chung was able to log in and roll the robot over to the patient with the Baghdad staff looking on.

The robot is controlled with a laptop and joystick and wirelessly transmits images and sound between doctor and patient. Two camera lenses and antennas sit above the screen. Sensors along the bottom keep Chung from running the robot into walls and warn him when someone is approaching it from behind.

There are about 250 similar robots are being used by civilian hospitals
The Chungbot recently began a rotation as a trainer, allowing deploying nurses from Wright-Patterson Air Force Base in Ohio to get more specialized burn injury training at a patient’s bedside.

This is far more advanced as compared to normal telemedicine where consultations with specialists in those cases are often done over the phone, leaving the specialist without the ability to see the patient and injury — something that could change with this type of technology, he said.

Michael Jackson: Finally to be burried today

May be I should say that... " finally, the body of Michael Jackson will be buried today" at Glendale Forest Lawn Memorial Park today. MJ will join many other celebs at Forest Lawn.

His coffin which cost around 20,000 pounds will be decorated by messages of love and affection from his children expressing how they miss him.

This cemetery was established by Credit Hubert Eaton in the early last century. He was an engineer and he decided to name it a park because he thought the word cemetery does not sound good. He even proposed to people to do wedding ceremonies at his property, among the big names who wed there is the former US president, the late Ronald Reagan who was married by Jane Wyman at this park.

Eaton himself is buried in the main chapel under the altar

Sometimes classical music is played in absence of any living people within the compound behind closed gates. May be is played for the ones who are in eternal rest in there!!!

Journey across river ruvuma - Hatari hii

Wazo!!


Kamba ya katani - Sisal rope



Preparation in progress. Three boats joined together ready to ferry cars across river Ruvuma between Mozambique and Tanzania.
Miti tu inatosha kuunganisha boti, pamoja na kamba za katani


Car inlet and outlet




Tayari gari imeshapandishwa

Phew!

Well done guys!

Haya ndio matatizo ya kuvuka mto Ruvuma sehemu ya Mtwara ambapo daraja sijui limehama au...... Vijana wanajipatia hadi dola 1000 kwa siku kwa kuvusha watu na mizigo kwa kutumia mitumbwi. Masula ni mapatano, ukiwa mzungu wanaanzia dola 500 kuvusha gari, lakini ukipiga pepe pepe wanashuka.

soma hapa for more info

BOOOOOM !!!

Just imagine you are the driver of this car, where will you decide to go first? .... Is it possible.... are you going to stop??

This is the world we are living in, our personal interests gives us no direction to go.

No collective and sequential decisions. And then ... we all blame the driver!

Just give yourself a thought for some days, and do evaluation by yourself and asks yourself whether you are the driver, passenger or the vehicle!

Ndugu zangu, uchaguzi wa wenyenchi unakuja, je, wewe mwananchi ni abiria, dereva au chombo cha kuwabeba hao abiria na dereva. Nina imani mahali popote tulipo, tunaweza kuboresha hali hiyo. tafakari wiki hii yote , halafu weekend pata....... uburudike na kuondoa machungu yote!