Dar!

Kwa wale wanaoifahamu Dar vizuri, hakika wanaitambua

sehemu hii. Unataka kupata jack pot? Jaribu kunena.

Yaliyojiri kwenye safari hii

Safari yangu ya Dar ilikuwa na matukio mengi ya kufurahisha.
Lakini penye mengi hapakosi na machache ya kuogofya.


Siku ya jumamosi nilikuwa nimetoka na familia kuelekea nje ya jiji kuona maendeleo ya hukoo kwa wananchi. Tukiwa kwenye high way ya kwenda Bagamoyo, kwa ghafla wife akashtukia jambo........, maana aliona mwenendo usio wa kawaida kwenye chini kidogo ya dashboard...

Alipo angalia kwa makini, hakukuwa na kosa, maana alimuona kiumbe wa malaika akitambaa taratibu kuelekea palipokuwa na gear ya gari, wakati huo mie nilikuwa nimekaza macho mbele maana mwendo kasi wa barabara hii, na uwingi wa magari, inabidi uende kwa uangalifu.

Kwa sauti ya staha na ukakamavu nikasikia mvumo wa sauti ukisema, Baba nanihii, nyoka huyo. Nilipiga jicho la haraka, na kweli alikuwa mwenyewe akielekea alikokaa waifu, ikabidi nitafute upenyo ili nisimame .. lakini nikaona anakuja kwangu hivyo nikamwambie amtwange, lakini... asilani akamkosa, na jamaa akabadili uelekeo wa kuja kwangu, na kugeuza uelekeo sijui alifikiri ndio salama huko.... Nilimtolea macho huku naelekea pembeni ya barabara, maana katikati ilikuwa ni hatari kwa magari mengine.
Niliposimama, nikaamuru watu wafungue milango waishie nje, lakini nyoka alikuwa mjanja sana, maana alishakimbilia sehemu ambayo waifu alikuwa ameweka miguu yake, na mlango ulipofunguliwa tu, yeye alikuwa wa kwanza kutoka na kutokomea porini!

Tulisimama hapo kwa dk 5 kupekua gari yote, maana watoto walikuwa usingizini kiti cha nyuma. Baadaye tuliondoka kuendelea na safari huku tukitweta.

Kwa sasa tunachukua tahadhari kupaki chini ya miti na kuacha madirisha wazi, maana hawa wageni nao jua likizidi, duh, lazima wajisalimishe.

I am Back

The journey from Dar es Salaam to Kigali was longer than we expected... It took us nearly seven hours from the time of departure from Dar es Salaam to the time of landing in Kigali.

By direct flight it is hardly 2 hours, but there is no direct route anyway.

We had to go through four countries

From Dar es Salaam (Tanzania) We went to Nairobi (Kenya) where where we had to connect to Kigali, but our flight was cancelled and we were connected to the flight going to Bujumbura (Burundi) and after more than one hour in Bujumbura, we flew to Kigali (Rwanda) arriving nearly at 4.00 am completely exhausted.

Make Life Easier for Yourself

First give yourself a rank. Call yourself something like ‘Reverend’

Then you start preaching that you can cure anything – AIDS, you can make cripples walk, you can bring the dead back to life. Tell whoever will listen to you that you can raise the dead. They wake up from their graves and start dancing the rhumba, samba, sindimba or something.

Just believe in your lies and they will believe in whatever song you sing.

Then after two months promote yourself to archbishop and say Haleluhya everytime.

Never forget that there is a sucker born every minute in this world. They will believe whatever you say. It is good business, i mean the religion business.

Call your business, the Full Nondo Gospel Church. No body will realise the fishy name. It pays. Just don’t forget to say Haleluhya a lot.

And when you get a crowd of worshippers, announce that you will run for parliament. By that time you will have all those titles. You could call yourself prophet. So your name will be Dr. Prophet Nicodemus (MP) of the Full Nondo Gospel Church!

Then you can make money from the church and from the politics.

Mjini hapo, maisha ni akili, na akili ni nywele.

Katizo la muda

Wapendwa wana blog

Leo nimekumbuka nyumbani.
Nimetoka ofisini moja kwa moja kuelekea airport. Natumaini usiku huu nitakuwa Dar es salaam.
Mkiona kimya basi mjue ndio nipo njiani.

Tukutane tena baadaye kwa habari motomoto za nyumbani

Honduras: This is a Joke now!

Honduras’s deposed President Manuel Zelaya on his efforts to regain office he manages to slip in into the Honduras and taking shelter in the Brazilian Embassy.

The interim government has asked Brazilian embassy to handle him to them so that he can be charged from frauds he made.

I think this is a drama show by which the current Honduran government is trying to. They are the one who deposed him to Costa Rica after forcefully remove him from the power, now they are coming with accusations that he has case to answer. My question is.... why did they deposed him in the first instance! And why did they denies him entry when he attempted to go back!!

Hayo ndio mambo ya Dunia.

Uganda: Nani wa kulaumiwa?

Hii sheria ya wapi! Nafikiri wale jamaa wawili wameshapata khabari kwenye makalio yao pia

Wiki iliyopita kulikuwa na vurugu Jijini Kampala ambazo zilijitokeza baada ya Kabaka Ronald Mutebi kupigwa kizuizi na Serikali ya Uganda cha kwenda kuzuru wilaya ya Kayunga kwenye sherehe ya vijana. Kwenye wilaya hii kuna mchanganyiko wa makabila mbalimbali ikiwa ni pamoja na kabila dogo la Banyala ambao hawataki kabisa uwepo wa Kabaka.

Serikali ilidai ni kwa sababu ya kiusalama, lakini kizuizi hiki kilisababisha vifo kadhaa vya wananchi waliopinga kizuizi hicho, machafuko hayo yalienda sambamba na uharibifu wa mali pamoja na wizi.

Mimi nafikiri kuna umuhimu wa kuweka ukomo wa kiongozi, nahisi Mchungaji Yoweri amekuwa anatoa maamuzi kama vile anaongoza familia yake na kusahau kuwa Uganda ni ya waganda wote. Ni wakati muafaka wa kustaafu ili abakize kasifa fulani ambako watu watakuwa wanamkumbuka.

Magic: Being able to make private part disappear

How can you make somebody's private parts disappears just before the act of sex!!!

Click the article to read.